a girl and her boy

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Tag Archives: meditation

Meditation Monday

Drink your tea slowly and reverently, as if it is the axis on which the world earth revolves – slowly, evenly, without rushing toward the future.  Thich Nhat Hahn.

The first cup moistens my lips and throat.  The second cup breaks my loneliness.  The third cup searches my barren entrail but to find therein some thousand volumes of odd ideographs.  The fourth cup raises a slight perspiration – all the wrongs of life pass out through my pores.  At the fifth cup I am purified.  The sixth cup calls me to the realms of the immortals.  The seventh cup – ah, but I could take no more!  I only feel the breath of the cool wind that raises in my sleeves.  Where is Elysium?  Let me ride on this sweet breeze and waft away thither. Lu Tung, “Tea-Drinking.”

A woman is like a tea bag:   You can’t tell how strong she is until you put her in hot water. Eleanor Roosevelt.

One Goal. One Purpose. One Mind.

I spend a lot of time thinking about self-improvement, eco-ethical decisions, and how to best make every day better than the one before for me and those in my life and community. This past month, starting on my birthday, I began meditating and journaling on the year past and the year to come in preparation for my new year resolutions. And this year, I have just one goal. Just one.

Be mindful.

Of my emotional, mental, spiritual, and physical well being. Of my relationships. Of my impact on my community. Of my impact on the planet.

One goal. Multiple beneficiaries.

This one goal breaks down into many little steps. I am taking one small step in January that I hope will be the foundation:  to meditate and stretch every morning before I do anything else. I haven’t thought out the steps for the rest of the year. I figure that will come with the meditation and daily mantras.

Daily Mantra

image from Mangtacio on Flickr

image from Mangtacio on Flickr

One thing I have done for myself is develop a mantra. I’ve been working diligently to cultivate the positive, create an upbeat attitude during these trying times and the mantra has been part of the routine for about three weeks now. Each morning when I wake up, I say out loud to myself:  “Today is a great day, and all is right in my world.” Yes, I have many difficulties, many of which I’ve revealed here on this blog and others I have not yet shared due to the sensitive nature of them, but that makes each day no less great or full of potential. Each day has vast potential.

[Mantacio’s Flickr Stream]

Reflecting on Wise Words

One of my favorite people online,  Amber from Berlin’s Whimsy, has the following quote on her sidebar and it struck a chord within me. Not only do I have a profound respect and admiration for Buddhism, but I really needed these words right now:

The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past, nor to worry about the future, but to live in the present moment wisely and earnestly. Buddha

I have definitely been doing a lot of this lately. I constantly live in the shadow of my experiences and in fear that I have messed up the future. I am going to make a concerted effort to work on this.

Striking Out

I have one strike left and this week will be counted among the worst weeks I’ve had in a while. School is going fine; it’s the after school stuff that is frustrating right now.

I have been wanting to take yoga classes since I was a freshman in college. I was always too shy to do so, though, because of various insecurities. So I never did. I’ve thought about yoga, read up on stances and practices, and have dreamed about being a yoga-master. In August, I read that one of the local adult education programs is offering a beginner’s yoga class. Great! thought I and I sent in the registration form immediately. I waited for six weeks for the class, bought my mat and block, and began reading up on some of the beginning stances to get ready for class. Two weeks ago I drove to the neighboring town for the first class, waited in the room for twenty minutes wondering what was going on since no one else showed up, and then went to the adult ed office. Come to find out, the class had been postponed for two weeks because their minimum enrollment had not been met. They waited to see if anyone else would sign up. Yesterday, I got home from work all excited after a very long day (staff meeting and then an SAT Prep Training organization meeting – more on this soon!) knowing that after my stressful day I’d be going off to yoga to relax, meditate and get some exercise. WRONG. I called to be sure the class was on and this time it was cancelled and I was told my refund is in the mail. What a major let down. I’m really bummed about it.

And then today was a good day at school. No big meetings, no major behavior problems with the students, no major failures with lessons. It was a good day. And I was looking forward to a good visit to an orthopedic surgeon I’d been waiting to see for a month, no, correct that, five years.

Back in 2003 I fell and hurt my shoulder, and this is after a history of dislocations. I saw a doctor, got x-rays and a MRI, began therapy, was told I needed surgery, and then lost my insurance. I’ve been waiting five years for resolution on this issue. Every day for five years, my shoulder has been achey, if not outright painful. I have limited motion and use. Sometimes I’ll pick up a medium-sized hard cover book and I’ll get shooting pain and I’ll be incapacitated for a few days. Running makes it ache something fierce.

I was looking to the surgeon to offer me relief in the form of knowledge of the issue and a plan for care. Instead, I got incredulous looks when I said I dislocated it three times growing up (didn’t see any supporting damage on the five-year-old x-rays), and was told that the tear was teeny and the previous surgeon’s suggestion to get it operated on right was jumping the gun a little. He essentially told me that he couldn’t do anything for me and to kindly leave so he could go to his meeting he was late for because he saw me 45 minutes late (I was there 20 minutes early).

So, I’m totally okay with the surgeon being honest with me about the situation. That’s his job. But not offering any suggestions on courses to take for resolution, rushing me in and out in about 10 minutes, and not asking questions about the effects of this injury on my activities and other probing questions made me feel like he didn’t see any need for me to be there and that I was wasting his time. He made me feel like I was lying about my previous injuries and care. He made me feel like there was no hope of ever having full use of my arm again.

Let me repeat, it’s been five years since I could reach for a glass in a cupboard at eye level without pain, on the days that I’m able to do so.

I’m very frustrated. I’m very hurt. I’m very let down.

This appointment was a gateway for me. I’ve been channeling all my pain towards this day, saying that once I see the surgeon I’ll get better, I’ll be fixed. And not having that right now really hurts.

Everything comes in threes. What will strike three be?